Is what you’re holding onto, worth the space it’s taking up?
Holding onto things that just don’t serve us anymore is crazy.
What are you holding onto, that you need to change today?
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Hey friends, you’re listening to This Quote Changed My Life – a podcast about intentional action. My name is Tracey and I’m the host of the show! I’m also a Wellness Coach, a mum of 3 kids and I’m based in Australia with my American husband. I want to give a quick shout out to my American listeners – hello! Head over to my Instagram @makesunshineco and let me know where in the US you’re from – we have family in North Carolina and Ohio, and we miss them so so much.
Anyway, I do hope everyone is well – we’re now in December and headed out of 2020. The year has been rough but hopefully you’ve been able to still find some space to just breathe and figure some stuff out, turn lemons into lemonade!
This episode’s quote is very relatable to 2020 – it’s – is what you’re holding onto, worth the space it’s taking up?
This about that for a second – is what you’re holding onto, worth the space it’s taking up?
Now, I don’t know about you – but as a person who suffers from an anxiety disorder – I can hold a thought, an event, a misspoken word, a socially embarrassing faux paux for YEARS. I can replay events from years past until it forms it’s own little camp ground in my brain and roasts its own marshmallows. There is A LOT of stuff that I’ve held onto – and I’m sure that you are also holding onto some things that are just not serving you right now…
Sometimes it’s because of an anxiety disorder, but other times we hold onto things out of habit, or even comfort. Sometimes things just become what we do, what we know, what we’ve always known, and it gets REAL TIRING doesn’t it?
It can cause a lot of stress, whether we are aware of it or not – and that stress can start to manifest in other ways. I know that I start to get more headaches and I grind my teeth at night when something is up in my waking life – when I haven’t dealt with something, or I’m doing too much, or not speaking up – I am holding onto something that I just don’t need to carry anymore.
Have you ever gotten to that point too?
Can you think of something – anything – in your life right now that you’re thinking. It can be anything for this exercise – for example, I grew up as this awkward, Asian Australian teenager. Bad teeth, glasses wearing, short 15yo who loved music that wasn’t popular at school and would rather sit in the music rooms at lunch time. I was different and had a hard time with my identity back then. And I do still carry those feelings today – I think we all feel that way sometimes – where for a bit, you don’t know if this version of you is the version you’re sure about and proud of. I was holding onto the idea that I need to be like the popular girls, in order to be liked and be valued.
And hearing myself think that and say it out aloud now – that’s not something I want to carry into my future – I wouldn’t want my kids hearing it, and repeating it. I want them, me and you to know that you can drop those comparisons, because there is nothing better than a person who is authentically themselves. The idea of a clone, wasn’t worth the space it was taking up. So I started working on what made me feel happy, proud – what part of me did I want to share – and knowing that I didn’t need to do it because someone else told me to – it was my own heart on show and I didn’t need approval or applause anymore.
Another quick example of mine is the way I was trying to run our household, as a wife and a parent and everything else I was doing at the time. I held on to the idea that because I work from home, I should be doing everything. 7 days a week. And that idea really really sank big time, because no one else learnt how to take care of the house and I only became more exhausted trying to keep up. Letting go of the idea that ‘stay at home’ meant I had hours and hours of relaxation, has given me back the drive to move forward with my small business, and it’s also made my family step up and do their part in the house they all live in.
So – what are you holding onto? Life long mistruths? Fresh ones? Things you’ve recently told yourself so you would stay in a comfort zone? Things someone else has told you, but in reality you know it’s just not true? Things you thought you believed, but actually you could see it another way?
Can you work on listening to yourself – and asking yourself what YOU really want out of this life? More of the same? More would be fine if it was something that made you happy – but what about if you were experiencing more regret? Could you work on a way that you wouldn’t feel like you were missing out anymore? Could you find a way that you didn’t feel like you were being taken advantage of – even if you volunteered to do it in the first place? Is this your burden?
If you were carrying it on your back, as a physical bag of rocks – is it worth a broken back, just to keep carrying it around? Does it matter that much?
Yes our lives can’t be all rosy and easy going – but there are definitely some things in our lives that we take on, that we didn’t need to carry around for so long. Learn to listen to yourself, learn when you need help, learn when enough is enough. You are your own best advocate for a better life – be responsible for your future. Is what you’re holding onto, worth the space it’s taking up?
Thank you again for listening to this episode of This Quote Changed My Life.
As always you can find me on Instagram @makesunshineco and over on my Patreon where we have just started our second mindset & mindfulness challenge. Come over and join us if you would like to work more on the What Are You Holding Onto theme – or sign up to receive a couple of extra podcast episodes. I’d love to see you there!
Let me know what you thought of this week’s quote – has it made you think a bit more about what you’re holding onto?
Thanks again everyone, I will speak to you again soon!